Lovers’ Elipse

Blowing him a gentle kiss
It is “he” she’s truly going to miss
His most handsomeness’

Lacing her fingers around his being; whole
Engulfing his entire quintessence;
She delicately fondles his beautiful soul
Complete coalescence

Taking a needed step for her protection
She needs to stop being skeptic of accepting
Start consenting to all her countless beautiful blessings

Into his soul she slipped deepest to roam
In his arms she felt unconfined; so, she wrote
She, for once, feeling completely awoke

In his eyes, it was she he kept undressing
His inability to understand his second guessing
Unable to express his sins he so wishes to transpire
All he’s able to do is stand back & admire

He believes a queen amongst the rubble
He think he’s mate amongst her mess
He has found his lover hidden undercover

As he is to sing
Beautiful music note for note; was sung
Into the night’s air it lingered & hung

Unbeknownst to him
Little whispers that escape her lips
Sugar-coated so sweetly all the way to the tips
She took total control;
A lovers’ eclipse

BARE

Spiraling, time slides on
Feelings, everything went wrong
Foundation weakened; not so strong
My feelings, only, truest of true all along

Brought to you, My heart
I gave it freely from the start
I watched you in pure shock & horror
Slowly & manically you rip & pick it apart

Compare not to anything to which you belong
Empty became the challenge all along
Nirvana never walking by both our sides
Riddles of your discrepancies I would question, “Why”?

I had let you do as you wished
I, not your priority was bullshit
A shift; I no longer missed your kiss
I will never dismiss my feelings overall this

Dreams of my fantasies & wishes
A man to which will call me misses
Relationship to cherish never perish
Standing strong in complete fairness

Is that such rareness?

SICK

Thickness as you are to inhale
Feeling to be derailed & impaled
A heart so sensitive & frail
Heavier breath on each unveiled exhale

A lover of many years; double crossed
Contaminated any further thoughts
Trusting humans is at what cost?
After what he did; you’re at a loss

Sleep deprived, led astray and rationalized away
Institutionalized for your continuous cries; everyday
Wanting to meet your judgment day; getaway
Haunted, resumed today; the horrors of yesterday

You, crushed, left to live this masquerade
Abused by a twisted demon of another; overcame
Abandoned by a scheming mother; dismay
You called her out; she proclaimed you insane

Blighted by family & lover & their deceitful lives
Embracing the darkness w/in you; thrives
Feelings arrears & all your worst fears appear
All your might you choose not to smite & instead write

You know you can win this fight!
Alone, right?
It will be okay
I foresee it in my sights
Breathe….
everything will be
‘aight….
🙂

Table four Two <>

(Why’d, I cry?)

Contempt’ment grew inside
What was it he thought I were to do?
It was the only thing I knew to be true
Of course I’d internalize it; like I always do

(Rejection)

Tears filled thine softest of hearts
Feelings of jealous is where I fell apart
Kept, left,….neglected…off to the side;discarded
The finish was right where we had start

(Truth)

Till death did us part
You killed me; ripped me apart
Crushed my soul & hurt my body
You are for sure not too smart

(Another lover)

He hid his selfish acts
Sneaking pills behind my back
Acting holier than though; no facts
Sucking them down to the max

(Take my hand)

Another gentle-man
Love to which would blossom, began
He, not until I had already constructed my wall
Secret plans wound up in the, worst of all; trash can

(I quit)

Trying to find a man & become his wife
Trying to manage the love of my life
Loneliness & discord to perish in this fight
Laying it all on the line & accepting of even strife

(why?)

My hope had once cried
I told her she needed to subside
She continued her rant
She then delivered me my last chance @ romance

(Good bye)

I wish I knew
I wish I knew if it were you
My love would surely ensue
Just then what would “we” do?

(Hello)

What is it you bring to this table?
What is it you truly are capable of?
Is there any instability or inability?
Would you turn our story into a fable?

(Tell me; why?)

Are we to share a moment of two?
Do we become lovers like others do?
Would we even possibly make love, too?
Just me & you?

I wish i knew

I wish i knew

I wish i knew if it were you~

Sweet Child Of Mine

Her story was sad
The one as a child & kid
Raised by an unemotional Dad

The visions of once a mom
Possibly siblings towing along
The dreams of she to finally belong

Memories of best of times, she is lost
Invaded by other memories she’d rather not
Too much of a hefty cost

A mother so caught up rather than not
A father saddened by all his after-thoughts
Both; neither, can she rejoice in, for what was taught?

Reality struck at her grey-ing stage
Leaving her memorized about the delusional haze
The years she spent scribbling page by page

Family, she’s felt to have bruise her soul
Trying to take over utter complete control
If you don’t succumb you are scum
(so they told)

Forced upon, this “child”, are the memories
The vicious cycle on a step-child
Damaging a child’s psyche every night/day
She fucked her in every single way

Siblings to tell horror story, each to top
A bio-mother who was told to stop
A bio-father who she doesn’t talk to a lot

The ranks have failed
Her grandfather was the last male
Now a reign by an irrational female

She gracefully bows out
Shakes her head for what their about
Waves w/a goodbye & shout & she’s out

Her life alone she will atone
Her sins over the years
To come clean of all her fears

Time to leave them behind
Time for her to belong to herself and let that all die
Creating & building her very own design

Her life is really
MINE

FLY

Those wings, I’ve watched get clipped
My child, metaphorically transcribed
Don’t let others give you a reason to hide

Don’t let those you choose, to be around, dictate to you
Build your own tower to which will house your heart
It is totally up to you to start a new venture being YOU

Pasts are filled with so many ‘woulda, coulda, shoulda’
Nothing fair to those that fall victim of the blame game
Pointing fingers and blaming behaviors; you failed

It’s time to stretch those wings; my young child
They are, by far, not clipped; not even the tips
Take that step or leap, I’m begging you, off that window sill

Don’t fear falling for you can’t fall farther
Where you stand is by your actions you so harbor
A pact you made w/the devil thinking you smarter

Trapped in smoke so thick; you can’t think straight
Further and Further I watch you sink at a fast rate
An abyss; I have yet to accept & still reject, no debate

Hollow eyes stare back at me
Pupils you can’t even see; black to white
Midnight to match her hurtfelt soul

Damage you’ve done smoking for fun
The drugs you picked up; scarred my heart
Empathy turned enabling is where it all did start

Watching you fall apart rips out my heart
My child, the daughter I knew and loved
This new one, where did she come from?

Someone please tell me……

HOME BOUND

Stop the brain
Cease the pain
Refrain from distain

The hours; they slip past
Another day gone by; at last
Dawn to follow; so fast

To wake another morn’
Removed all stuck in thorns
Reclaimed your thrown of scorn

Beseech of those who have betrayed
Replace the thoughts from yesterday
Building a tomorrow, evenly today

Into your glass house; you quicky retreat
No stones will you cast; no words to speak
Shards of glass no longer stuck in your feet

With out a crown
If you have to, you’ll go it alone
A venture called
“Home”

Chills

Amongst the winds
There she stands strong
Gusts blowing through her hands

On the cliff
On the ledge
She’s a beauty; statuesque

Seagulls to circle
So many often do
Squawking instead of a soft sweet coo

Chill from all the winds
Shivering her bones
Turning her back; wanting to go home

To build a home in the hills
Beautiful meadow down below
One with Victorian frills for show

Sitting on the edge, she fantasizes
A land before a time she’s seen
Glimps’in of a loving family; romanticising

Dreams once birthed
Her heart she didn’t unearth
Kept it hidden, deep under dirt

That line she dances
Balancing not to be her friend
Falling deeper in the end

Amongst the winds
There she stood strong
Until that final gust came along

Off that cliff
Off that ledge
She gave up and dove instead

Only Her Heart

Silently turning your back
Closing your eyes
Making it all fade to black

Much sooner than not
Her heart she gave you; a lot
Her softest of spots

Rejection ripped her soul
The quiet answer of no
She should have let go

No, my dear…say it is not so
Silence you gave
After she called you her beau

She stood there before you
Not knowing what to do
Wishing you had loved her too

Silently turning your back
Walking away, such a hard task
Not your princess w/the slipper made of glass

(only her heart)

You’re not his lover…..

Out of reach and way too far
Thinking; then, there is no harm
Seeking comfort in another’s virtual arms

20 yrs she had to wait
Now she’s trying to fulfill her delusional fate
Too bad he already has a playmate

Months spent talking a lot
Caressing their deepest of thoughts
Helping them both feel loved a lot

As thine eye winked so sly
She had caught her guy
From the moment he did say hi

Love to which was once lost
Passion fulfilled; so fucking hot
Temptations; thrills at a cost

Blessed she should feel
Instead envy that isn’t real
Justice to jealousy doesn’t appeal

Assurance to be given to each other
Affirmation for feelings to be felt like lovers
A sense of two hearts newly rediscovered

It’s way way too late
No longer for you to contemplate
He’s in love with another; by, non-virtual dates